The world of disability is a lonely one! The road has been lined with tears, pain, dashed hopes. But it has also had wonderful lessons that have made me who I am today! Let me explain, Albert is deafblind. He does not see, speak or hear. His perception of the world has been through his primary caregiver, his mother. My mother! We have cared for him, fed him, clothed him and bathed him for close to 5 decades now. Today the round-the-clock care continues. Many times I have asked myself how different life would be if he had just one of the senses. What would he say to me? About my work? Life choices? Wish he could have been the big brother to shield me from the bullies. Stand behind him when those people in my neighbourhood where I grew up said nasty things (you know who you are). Wished he could have walked me down the aisle. Instead, it was the other way around. I had to grow up fast. Be the ‘big sister’. I bathed him, clothed him and fed him and protected him from the world that has such high levels of ‘perfection’ that it shuns anyone who seems ‘less than perfect’. Sometimes I mourn my lost childhood but it was for a good cause. For a man who is pure. For that is what Albert is. He has seen no evil, heard no evil and uttered no evil. Literally! His soul is pure. No ill will. No malice. And that is why I will fight to the death for him. Sacrifice everything for him. It is my mother to whom I am forever grateful. She could have abandoned him. As some have done. She stayed with him. Nurtured him. Paid the price, sacrificed good jobs in the private sector, opting for a job in the civil service that had flexible hours to allow her care for ‘my son’ That is how she lovingly refers to him. She put all relationships aside because she did not want distractions from the job she believes was given to her by God! Through her I have seen the true meaning of unconditional love.
