Finally when she retired – our prophets actually retire when they go bust – after a bitter dispute with her male prophet partner, she started wearing short dresses and lo and behold – she actually had human legs!
Unlike the prophets of yore who were not recognised in their homelands, the Ugandan prophets are adored by the people they grew up with.
They are an inspiration to village mates and slum mates who on seeing them drive big cars also work hard to become achievers.
Then we have the smaller prophets, mini-prophets in fact, who do not have to carry any bible and they are in their millions.
These ones prophecy the outcome of European football matches every weekend.
Powering Kampala’s fastest growing service industry, the million mini-prophets have given employment to hundreds who handle the sports bets – sorry prophecies – and the sector is rapidly spreading to the countryside.
In fact it is difficult to find any trading centre in the country that doesn’t have a sports prophecy dealership.
And they are very technology compliant. Soon there will be no more pieces of paper, as many dealerships are now handling the sports prophecies online.
I think they should be praised for being environmentally friendly as trees will no longer have to die to produce so much paper that the million prophets have been using to foretell Man U’s recovery and Arsenal’s next player transfer deal.
